Wordless Wednesday

I seriously have no idea...I'm not sure he knows what he was doing either.

(Date on the picture is wrong, this was a self-portrait taken just a few days ago.)

Splish Splash I was Takin' a Bath!

So I'm getting ready to take a shower the other day and I open the shower door to turn on the water. I notice, much to my dismay, that the shower really needs to be scrubbed and that there are shampoo bottles all over the floor. I say noticed...it was actually more like acknowledged, because I knew the state of the shower a few days prior, just chose to ignore it, hoping it would clean itself.

One of the reasons it gets so messy is because my kids prefer to use it over their own bathtub in their own bathroom! I have no idea why, they just do. And for some reason, it never occurs to them, or my husband, to toss the empty bottles in the trash can when they are done showering. Course, it did take me 2 or 3 days to actually bend over and do it myself, so I guess I shouldn't be talkin' smack about my lazy family.

Anyway...with a heavy sigh, I bent over to pick up the empty bottles and underneath one of them found this:



Sorry, I know the picture quality stinks. I told you all I have a crappy old camera, right? It's certainly not my photo taking skills. I said I NEED A NEW CAMERA! And no remarks about my housekeeping skills, either! I am working on it, people!

It's a scorpion. A big, dead scorpion. I have no idea how long our visitor had been there. I know the bottles had been on the shower floor for 2 or 3 days. What if it had been there the whole time!?!? AAUUGGHH!! How freaky! At least it was dead, but my kid had just been in there a few hours prior taking his own shower! Needless to say, no more bottles get left on the shower floor.

And yes, I did scrub the shower, so it doesn't look like that anymore. I'm workin' on it, people!

Have You Ever Seen an Elephant Disappear?

A few months ago I shared my memories of my first circus, complete with an elephant parade through the middle of the small town where I lived. My kids got to see their first circus last week and WOW! It was so much better than the one I saw as a kid! For one thing, last week's circus was in an indoor arena and not outside in a tent, which made it much more comfortable! We also had really good seats, thanks to Feld Entertainment and Mom Central, so we were able to see everything really well, even when they were down on the opposite end of the arena. Ringling Brothers Barnum and Bailey chose a good theme this year in "Zing Zang Zoom". It coupled some really amazing circus acts with fun magic tricks. I think the best magic trick was when they made an elephant disappear! Yep, an entire elephant! The kids were absolutely amazed! And I was pretty impressed myself.

The acrobats were absolutely incredible. Talk about talent! There were numerous fearless feats taking place right in front of us including folks leaping through the air upside down and sideways, hanging from wires, riding on swinging on boards while flipping and twisting...it was all really cool to watch! Then there were those cage guys that ran around the hamster wheel spinning cage things, which would just make me ill, but made Little Man immediately decide to try to build one in our backyard. Nice. He already scares the life out of me with his lack of fear and his acrobatic abilities!

The animal acts were fun to watch, they included dogs, horses, elephants and tigers. I must have a thing for elephants, I found them to be the most entertaining. They have so much personality!

But my favorite part had to be the chicks who got shot out of a cannon. Cuz seriously? Who has that for a job? That's stuff you see on cartoons and old movies, right? I never really stopped to think that someone would actually do that for a living. It was so weird to actually see it in real life in front of my eyes. Boom! Chick flying through the air, lands in a big air bag...tah-dah!!

That's it, she's done for the night! Cake...right? I know, I know they practice during the day. C'mon! Don't wreck the easy job dream for me, folks! How does one get a cannon chick job, anyway? Maybe I'll apply. Although I have some concerns about the lycra suit and the whole weight/velocity thing.

It was a really fun family night and BONUS!...I ran into fellow blogger Melanie and family(she's got the cutest kids!), from My Little Patch of Sunshine and I also got to wave across the arena to my ticket winner, Trudi and family! My family will definitely do the circus thing again...great night of entertainment. Plus, I have a lot of questions for the cannon chick, so I have to go back to get the scoop before I apply for that job.

Don't forget, Zing Zang Zoom is traveling across the country and you can get a family 4 pack for $44 when you use the codeword MOM at ticketmaster(dot)com. Go see the circus this summer!

Who's Gonna Sell Me My OxiClean Now?

The first time I saw, or rather heard him, I thought he was the most annoying person on earth. No matter what I watched on TV, he would always show up, blah, blah blahing in that loud, irritating voice! But after a while, the voice became familiar and I would actually stop and listen to what the guy was selling. And one day I decided to buy what he was pitching. OxiClean has become a regular part of my laundry routine. And Billy Mays became a familiar face that made me smile, then wince, every time I saw him on TV with a new product - in spite of the fact that his pitch style and loud voice drives me crazy.

Now he's gone. And I'm just a tiny bit sad! I know...bigger TV celebrities died this week, but for some reason they didn't affect me like Billy did. While I liked Michael Jackson's music a little, I was never a huge fan. And I remember watching Charlie's Angels, but Farrah Fawcett was just some cute girl with cute hair to me. And Ed McMahon never brought me a giant check from Publisher's Clearinghouse, so I had crossed him off my list of likable celebrities a long time ago.

Billy Mays was around on a daily basis, in my face, always with something new. He COMMANDED me to stop and listen, even when I didn't want to. And I actually bought something I like because of his forceful, yet funny selling style. I wonder if he talked like that all the time, like even at dinner. "HONEY! PASS ME THE POTATOES THAT WERE COOKED IN THE NEW AND IMPROVED HOT POTATO COOKER, PLEASE!"

Even my kids knew who he was. When I told my husband that Billy Mays died, Big Brother immediately launched into the "Hi! I'm Billy Mays!" thing. And Little Man started listing all the products Billy Mays has pitched throughout the last few years. I know...somewhere in that little tribute to him by my kids is a sad statement about how much they watch TV. I guess all I'm saying is, love or hate the guy, he did his job and became a memorable face on TV.

I'm really sad for his family that he died so suddenly. And a little sad for me...now I have to choose a new pitch guy. Do I go with that english guy who sells the Magic Bullet and says the word "nachos" with a short "a" sound instead of the preferred short "o" pronunciation? Or the Sham-Wow guy with his non-chalant, tell it like it is, you're an idiot if you don't buy this, "this thing sells itself" attitude? Either way...these guys have some big shoes to fill.

R.I.P. Billy Mays. I hope you get a good gig in Heaven. Maybe you can sell that GOOP stuff to all the politicians who have passed on so they can wash their hands of all the crap they pulled while they were in office.

Here are a few fun Billy Mays sites you can check out to help you through the grieving process:

You Can Be "The Mays"

Billy Mays Pie Chart

A few funny videos:

The Community Fort/Clubhouse

Community clubhouse/fort that all the boys in the neighborhood work on every day:

(Yes, it's just a big hole they dug in the desert just west of my house.)

Some current members of the community club:

Neighborhood resident seeking membership in community club:

Not picture of actual snake in our hole, but very accurate representation...I was too afraid to take a picture of the actual snake in the hole, as it was very aggressive, so I ran home like a baby with the two boys in tow.)

Current members now contemplating resignation from community club:

I'm Back

It's amazing what a couple of days away from the computer can do to improve a person's psyche! I'm ready to start blogging again, but I have come to the conclusion that I need to make some changes to the blog. Which I already knew, I guess, because I have been talking about it for awhile now.

When I started the blog, I started it as a way to chronical my family's life and as a place where I could write. Because I love to write. Somewhere I kind of got lost. I was asked to review a few things, then a few more things and pretty soon I felt like my blog was becoming a review blog and not a ME blog! So...because I love doing both, I will continue to do both, but I will keep them very separate. From now on, I will only do reviews and giveaways on my review page. So if you wanna win stuff, you HAVE to visit the review page. I will have a little spot in one of the columns listing the giveaways to remind you to stop by the review page and enter the contests. How's that sound?

I haven't posted in a while about life in general because life in general has been throwing me lots of curves lately. Some good, some not so good. And I turned 45 last week. I am on my way to being middle aged. This is a weird place to be. I thought I would be farther along in my accomplishments by now. I don't feel like I have been very successful in a lot of areas. And I'm starting to get wrinkles. Along with the fact that I am still really overweight and struggling to get in shape, which I have struggled with since I was like 10 years old. So turning 45 was kind of hard. I'm not where I want to be in my life. Physically, mentally or temporally.

But some good things have come from my thinking about my age. I realized that I am not yet too old to change some of my issues. I still have time to lose weight and get healthy. I can still accomplish some of my goals, if I'll actually get my butt in gear and quit moping around the house. The wrinkle issue is a bit harder, but cosmetics have come a long, long way and there is LOTS of wrinkle filling collagen stuff out there that I can use to feel a bit younger. Or I can stay fat, that's been a pretty good wrinkle filler so far!

Really, the best thing that has come out of my turning 45 is that the big event really pushed me to sit down and think about what I want the next phase of my life to be like. Taking inventory isn't always fun and I can tell you my inventory came with a lot of personal revelations about my weaknesses and issues, but it helped me recognize where I tend to get stuck. I came out of the last few weeks with a renewed sense of purpose. I feel more comfortable in my own skin...except for the flabby, saggy skin that is appearing from my attempts to lose weight. I am SOOOO not comfortable with that skin.

But I am comfortable with a lot more of myself than I used to be. I am comfortable with the fact that I still have a lot of living to do. I am comfortable with the fact that I don't have to let the past define who I am. I am comfortable with the fact that who I am may change a little once in awhile as I grow and progress and become a wiser individual. I am amazingly comfortable with my belief system and my morals and values. I know who I am in those areas. I don't have to stop and think anymore about those things.

And I know now that I can be happy if I choose to be. I am comfortable knowing that I can leave my unhappiness behind now. It has served whatever purpose it was here to serve and I am free to let it go and move on with my life. I am comfortable seeking joy. I'm not sure how good I'll be at seeking joy and leaving unhappiness behind, but I'm gonna give it a try.

Hope you'll stick around while I work out the details. You guys give me strength to get through it all.

I Am Suffering from Technology Burnout!

It has been awhile since I posted. Almost a whole week. I am suffereing from severe computer/internet burnout. I used to wake up, take the kids to school, come home and immediately boot up the computer to check emails and start paying bills, writing blogposts, researching... whatever it was that needed to be done via the internet and my computer. One day a few weeks ago I realized I had no desire to get on the computer that morning. I KNOW! SCARY!!!

But I forced myself to do it. Then I had an even scarier revelation...I did not enjoy my time that day on the comuter. It felt like work. I have NEVER felt like writing my blog or checking my emails was work. EVER.

When it happened again the next day, and the day after that, I realized that I am in a bad place, technologically and mentally speaking. Or rather, typing. Because really, that's the problem isn't it? Sometimes we just need to talk. Typing and texting is great and has it's place, but speaking is just as important to our emotional well-being. I am tired of typing and reading. I want to speak and listen and if I'm going to read? I want to feel the pages as I turn them and smell the ink and mess up the stupid book jacket thing while I try to figure out what to do with it while I'm reading my book!

So I've been absent the last few days. And I might be absent here for a few more days. I've typed so much in the last six months that I have worn some of the letters off of my husband's laptop keyboard. He doesn't know how to type, so it's messing him up. "Where the freak is the N on this thing?" And why are there 2 C's on my keyboard!?" (There aren't 2 C's - one of the C's is a partially rubbed off O). See? My computer/internet obsession is even taking it's toll on the rest of my family. Laundry piling up, dinner getting later and later every night...you know the drill, right?

So I'm doing my own intervention. I need to get my head straight. I need to feel human again, and not robotic or computerized. I need to get back in touch with my family. Maybe reconnect with my kids. Even if it means my Facebook Farm Town goes unharvested. Yeah...it's that serious, folks.